Many of us are living with a misbelief that we ourselves are making our decisions, instead there often is
a very powerful drive pulling us
Now please, let me to tell you a little story. It happened around 15 years ago. I was working as an Au-Pair ( babysitter+housekeeper) in a very sweet family in Sweden. Ric and Eve had both careers and they took often longer days in their offices. One day Ric told he had arranged some changes in his team and from now on it would be possible for him to work from his home office every Friday ( instead of driving every singe morning 60 miles as he had done it earlier for years). This was expected as a very welcomed change. The week started off in the usual way.
Now I am asking you to imagine the next picture: Friday morning. I was coming back from the kindergarten and was cleaning up the breakfast mess in the kitchen, planning the dinner. He came up from the ground floor where his work area was, to put coffee on. Very satisfied – shining all over– he can skip driving today!
The whole hour! At least!
“Should i make you coffee and bring it downstairs maybe?” i tried to spare his time.
“No, no. I will do it myself, you do what you do …here every day, ok?” showing around.
I went to sort the laundry and was on the half way with ironing when heard him running with few long jumps upstairs, he completely had forgot about the coffee, it was good nothing happened!
“It`s OK, i will fix all here, sometimes it happens that the water will boil over when you are AT WORK, he laughed”
In 20 min
a very grumpy – in full suit and tie Ric – came up again. His teeth pressed together, he made the bears voice: I`ll go buy
some milk” he announced and took his car keys. He came back in 30 minutes, went downstairs and did not leave for hours
NOW he could focus
and work in peace!
The power of rituals
It is said, that it would take at least 21 days to properly run new roads into our brains for the new things. To create a habit. I think that struggling for 21 days in order to set up a new Ritual for yourself is a small cost in exchange of this kind of effect! If you do it right of course…
it will keep you on track!
Rituals can also be used as a bridge to overcome the gap, to soften that switch, from one activity to another to help the brain.
A quick shower, candle light, bringing out the crystals and a cup of tea works often just fine.
Rituals, a lot available in a negative way as well, smoking for example. I saw a case when smoking was quitted but the person kept walking back and forth on the pathway as for the years before – to the electric switchboard and back.
Did i forget something? This ritual he had was actually not supportive on Fridays, wasn`t it? How do you change it? How do you create new habits to help you?
Here is a free talk from the real life how to implement the rituals you wish to have in your life in a smart and less painful way 😉
What about your challenges? Please share.